I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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