Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Two words: nipple clamps
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