i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize