No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Randomize
