is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
