so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
