So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
