so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
