so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
