it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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