Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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