As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
