are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
