I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
