47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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