Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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