i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
