dude i'm inner monologue high
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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