In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
