Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
