Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
