I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
