When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize