Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
