she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
