She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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