he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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