Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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