I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
