belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
