operation harelip BJ is a go
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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