I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
