We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
