She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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