you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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