how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he thought i was a dude.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
