I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
