I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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