Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Randomize
