god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
