he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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