i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
