Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
God, you're like boner-b-gone
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
