She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
