Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
