he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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