I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
