it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
