You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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