Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
